RAISING LIONS

This book has been at my bedside for the past 2 years, as I reference it often. I only wish I had found it sooner. If you have a challenging toddler through teen--even if they're just going through a patch of challenging behavior--BUY THIS BOOK. The insight into what drives kids' behavior (and how we, as parents, can unwittingly support their tendency toward defiance) is invaluable. I have recommended this (endlessly!) as an early read to all my parent friends (they have all raved about it), I've bought additional copies for my mom and teachers, and I truly CANNOT RECOMMEND RAISING LIONS HIGHLY ENOUGH! My now-7YO son has been exceptionally challenging to parent since about age 3. He has struggled with impulse control to the point that every teacher he has had from preschool through Kindergarten has had to call me with news that he threw something at a child, hit a child, tripped a child, grabbed a child. When this would happen, the teachers would tell me that my son was actually generally acting up at school regularly, but these moments of physicality were the tipping points prompting their calls to me. I was devastated each time--AND EACH TIME, THE GAME-CHANGING SOLUTION WAS IN RAISING LIONS. When these instances would eventually occur in a new school year with a new teacher, it happened because the teacher was giving my son slack/getting to know him, and as a smart, clever, inquisitive, impulsive child, he discovered where, when, and how far he could push the limits...until he finally went too far and got physical with another child. Enter RAISING LIONS. After "The Phone Call From School," I would pow-wow with the teacher, tell them about this book and its specific methods (or buy them a copy), and WITHIN DAYS of them applying the methods (and us doing the same at home), my son's behavior improved dramatically. Within weeks, he was back to "normal limits" of the rest of the kids in school. One reviewer said there's nothing new here--and that the secret of the book is Time-Outs. For that, I have two thoughts... 1) This reviewer probably has a child (or children) more like my (currently 4YO) daughter. Who has never been a challenge to parent. I could have 4 of her and it would be as challenging to parent her four little selves as it is to parent her and my son combined. (Or maybe even easier with 4 of her than one of my son ;) 2) To say this book is just about giving Time-Outs is wayyyy oversimplifying. It's about understanding why children push limits. How we unwittingly encourage them to push limits. How to EASILY get this to stop--quickly! And for the most challenging among these children (who are, by nature, reprimanded frequently by teachers, parents, caregivers...), it provides methods and language to ensure that the kids don't develop self-loathing in the process--which is SUCH a critical piece of the puzzle for the long-term growth and mental health of kids who struggle with impulse control and listening to those in authority. Finally, one of the top reasons I love this book so much is because of the author, Joe Newman. As a child growing up in the 70s, he was the kid whose presence at the local playground would prompt families to turn around and go elsewhere. He was the kid struggling with impulse control, diagnosed with ADHD, put on medication, studied by the NIH (!) and LABELED a "bad kid" for his youth. He carried that label with him through early adulthood. My heart hurts even just thinking about all that he went through...and yet, look at how he was able to transform that pain. He SEES KIDS in a way that few of us can. He understands how to talk to them in ways that cultivate independence and self-worth while simultaneously preventing them from running away with the "Staff of Power and Control." He turned his anguish into action--developing this method and applying it in schools, over the past ~20 years...effectively transforming everything from typical kids' shenanigans to the most challenging behavior of previously untouchable "problem children"... I honestly get chills whenever I think/tell people about the book and Joe. I am SO GRATEFUL for his insight and experience, and I am here to tell you THE RAISING LIONS METHOD WORKS. Since discovering this book, my husband and I have taken the further steps of attending one of his webinars and scheduling a private coaching session and both have been incredibly helpful when parenting our brilliant little handful. To ANY parent experiencing any degree of chronic defiance with your child or children, READ THIS BOOK. It's an easy read, the insight is invaluable, and the sooner you read and consistently apply its methods, the less pushback you'll get from your child, and the more peaceful and balanced your family life will be. Stay strong, moms & dads! ❤️

I want to buy this book for every parent I know! Honestly, it quite possibly saved myself and my husband from verging into insanity. With 2 strong willed toddlers we were at the end of our tether. Little did we know that we were creating these fierce lions through our over explanation of rules and guidelines, our bartering and negotiating and our general demeanor of trying to stay calm, often appeasing them so that we could simply get things done! The break system that Joe describes has given us AMAZING results in a very short period of time and I feel quite relieved that we’re learning this when our little ones are 2 and 3. The real game changer was realizing that we could show them we had power too but in a calm way that connects us with them. The way to do that was through our tone. This took tons of practice! Initially I think we both associated the break with punishment and Joe really works hard to explain why that doesn’t work in this book. But fair to say that emotions can run high at times in parenting and we already had some very poor habits in place. Adjusting our tone to one of non judgment, staying consistent and taking back our own power in our home has been nothing short of life changing as the title of my review suggests. The biggest shock was when after a very short time of doing this, our older son, started to express thanks for taking the break. The kids are always calmer and happier after the breaks too and at such young ages, have really seemed to grasp the concept of self regulation. Mum and dad are starting to catch up too 😅 Honestly if you’re on the fence, please please come off it and read this book. And then reread it! And listen to any podcast with Joe being interviewed to really grasp the tone and tempo needed when giving the break. That’s been the key for us! We can finally get ready for childcare every morning without all the battles. There can still be resistance at times but the breaks keep everything calm and flowing. Happy days!!

I read this book as a teacher and as a parent. I have worked with children with special needs for 17 years and thought I should have a good handle on how to parent my own children - WRONG! My first born is a lion, and I needed this book to help me navigate how to parent him effectively. What I was doing for the first 4.5 years of his life wasn't working. His meltdowns and tantrums were getting bigger and harder to manage. I have now read this book twice, and have been really trying to follow the protocol this second time around. As my lion is about to start kindergarten and the behaviours are becoming more and more challenging to control, I worried about how school was going to go for him and knew something had to change...I am SO GLAD I found this book and started to enact the protocol. I am seeing huge changes in my son already after only sticking to the protocol for the past month or so. I see a light at the end of the tunnel, and seriously think we may have avoided a future of school struggles and possible unnecessary diagnoses and medication. I feel confident that with a shift in my mindset about how to parent my children I am going to set them up for success. Our home is already becoming a happier place for everyone - I feel less stressed, and so do the kids, because the protocol is consistent and they know what to expect. I strongly encourage all parents to read this book - especially if you have a lion, like me! I am telling all my family and friends about Joe's philosophy on how adults should be interacting with children. I so appreciate his viewpoint on challenging behaviour - not as "bad behaviour" that needs "punishment", but that all behaviour can be treated with cause and effect. Children need boundaries to feel safe. This book has changed my life as a parent!

I am not exaggerating when I say this book has changed my family's life. For the first time, after using the techniques I learned in Raising Lions, I can say that I feel like I am in charge as a parent. Not in a punitive or authoritarian way, but in a calm, easy and totally unforced way. The book seriously teaches you a simple, almost 3-step approach to every behavior problem you can think of and the kids just CHANGE. No more fights or drama or power struggles or screaming and when it does happen its short and no big deal and age appropriate-- an opportunity to learn and teach your kids. Not an epic, mind bending what the hell is wrong with me as a parent and what the hell is wrong with my kids EVERYDAY STRUGGLE! The other great thing about the book is it makes you really understand what happened with your kids and why they act the way they act. The tantrums and back talk and not listening are all part of a cultural shift in how we raise our children--we have done it to ourselves and them-yet we are totally clueless how to raise the "lions" we have created. I read the book in two nights and immediately started using the simple techniques. Its easy, its respectful, you can keep a sense of humor. There is no diagnosis or psychobabble. Just nonjudgemental, consistent guard rails that you place around your learning, testing children and they bump up against them and make adjustments. They learn how to control themselves and deal with their OWN frustrations and needs and impulses. The beauty and the sweetness is that THEN you get to just enjoy your kids. Its been a miracle for us. I highly recommend this book.

Even if your child is only showing mild behaviour problems this is still worth reading. I found a lot of these techniques worked wonders on my 3 and 5 year old