Chatting or Cheating

The material presented in this book is worth 4 stars, but the layout and font consistency is 2 stars, hence the average rating of 3 stars.

The #1 book I would recommend to anyone who has been betrayed by or have betrayed the person they love is Chatting or Cheating. I nearly did not purchase this book, but I am grateful I did. Many other relationship books focus on physical affairs whereas this book is very inclusive to online affairs and forms of cheating - which is exactly what my partner had done. It would benefit both parties of the ailing couple to read this and be open to the material presented.It has a wealth of information aimed at both the betrayed and the betrayer, breaking down the cheating from point of cerebral chemicals which feed your illusions of allure towards others, how casual friendships slide into cheating and also how to avoid this in the future, and the mind-f*ckery which goes along with the whole bonanza. It helps explain the mindset of the betrayed, the betrayer, and how to bring these two worlds together through guidance, commitment, and common sense.It also gives tips on how to figure out if your partner is cheating and how to approach the situation instead of flying off in a wild tangent of blubbering hostility and emotion (if you have not had the preliminary conversations of discovery/admission/denial as of yet). I wish I had discovered this book sooner. I wish my partner had read this sooner. It would have saved us both a lot of grief.Needless to say, my mind was blown when I devoured this book, and so was my partner's. Unlike many other "fix your relationship" books out there, this book made sense without tossing in further complications such as psychobabble and religion and kept the focus on the two individuals in turmoil brought on by the cheating. I was disappointed that the author did not have subsequent books, because once I read this book I felt as though someone had reached into our heads and hearts and knew us better than we knew ourselves.

I was hesitant to pick up this book, because of all the cheating that I have found in my dating history. To my delight, Sheri Meyers delivers clear cut answers to all the questions that I've been grabbling with for years.Her well stated advice on the difference between friendship and affair is quite clear. Friendship can wait, there is no attraction, no daydreaming and your partner can join in. To be honest, I have not finished the book, however, the last chapter that I read was on how most of the people who end up having affairs, are those who never would have thought that could happen to them. This in particular has given me a red flag on my close male friends. If I get in an exclusive relationship, they will definitely feel slighted. This book is giving me a warning already. That alone will make the purchase more than worth while.I have more to read, and have lots of questions that I'm hoping will be answered as I go along. But if you have ever had cheating happen to you, this book is a must read. It will help you understand what happened to both of you leading up to and after the affair is confirmed. If you never want this to happen again. Wake up and read this book.Thanks Sheri Meyers!

As stated, this book is well thought out and brings many points to light. Must say that most couples are aware of the points made by Ms Meyers but I guess we forget to put them into practice hence results in the type of situations Ms Meyers speaks of in the book.I would say that this book does offer something that was most interesting. It has no focus the way many self help books have on the hurt partner/victim of infidelities. Instead it takes a look at both sides of the issue and examines them in some detail. Must say I did wish that there was more detail annotated here but I guess that this is common to self-help books. I guess a good book is no substitute for a good marriage counselor.Either way I would say this is a worthwhile endeavor and would recommend it to anyone wishing to take a look at both sides of affairs with a focus on cyber-infidelities.

I downloaded this book on my Kindle as I needed it NOW and 2 day shipping was simply too long.A few days earlier I had realized that my significant other of 26 years was having an affair with an ex-girlfriend. Like Ms. Meyers said, at first he denied it saying he was just helping her through a 'bad time' (death of her husband and moving) but by following her advice and letting him read parts of her book, he finally realized and admitted that he had indeed been having an affair.Ms. Meyers writes and speaks in everyday language that is very easy though at times painful to read,Without her book, I would not have made it through suspecting, learning my suspicions were true, confronting him, his confession, etc. Instead I would be spending days angry and crying. Using her advice, we decided to stay together and 10 weeks later are in the 'rehab' phase building an 'affair proof' union that is already stronger that it was before his affair.

I'll just be quick.I have read several books regarding infidelity, I would HiGHLY recommend to start with this book. It is easy to read, direct, gives coaching, looks at both sides of the relationship, does not focus on blame, rather promotes reconciliation. If you are going through the hardship of an affair, emotional or physical, this is the book to start with to begin understanding what has happened, what is happening, and how to move forward. This is a crash course book! Lots of great information condensed in a wonderful layout. EXCELLENT BOOK.After, I would suggest other more in depth books.Sue Johnson EFT books are the best for repair and understaning healthy relationships, seek a professional trained in this approach for marriage counseling. (Statistically, your marriage will have a greater chance of success.)Not just friendsHow to help your partner heal after an affairJohn Gottman's books are great also.

repetitive

There is a way out of the pain... Thank you Sheri :)

Good practical advice.

Helped me to understand and address my concerns

This book is full of logical and practical advice and strategies for both partners. I found Sheri's writing style and use of practical examples to be useful, despite being confronting.