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H**N
Do You Want to Become More Assertive in Your Life? Here's How
The Assertiveness Workbook by Randy Paterson, Ph.D., has been an excellent tutor for my therapy clients.Holly Hooton, LMFT
J**E
Readable, workable, and fun
It is my experience that few people have strong communication skills -- are capable of gracefully disagreeing, giving opinions, asserting boundaries, confronting people. Most of us either go along with others, try to pacify, avoid confrontation and never say "No," (the passive style) or we boss others around, intimidate them, and force them to give in to "our way" (the aggressive style). There is also the passive-aggressive style which attacks indirectly in order not to take responsibility -- by forgetting, having "accidents," being late, or being slow in responding to a request agreed to. AND sometimes, hopefully more and more, we use the assertive style. The essence of assertiveness is assuming responsibility for your own behavior and acknowledging your thoughts and preferences honestly while also respecting the feelings and opinions of others. Paterson notes that each of these styles is used by all of us at one time or another; and we each have a style we use most.The book is an excellent handbook which will increase your awareness of yourself and others in all interactions. Further, the author guides you step by step into increasing your flexibility of responses. First, Paterson has assessments for determining which of these four styles you use most. He also explores how we learn these behaviors and when it is appropriate to use each. Beginning with the easiest situations in your own life, you start practicing the assertive style. One of my favorite exercises was called: A Walk in Town. The idea is to practice overcoming passivity by the way you walk. You use a favorite actor or dancer as a model of confidence. The best guide for me was: let your chest enter the room first, not your nose. Although the subtitle of the book emphasizes overcoming passivity, this book is also for those who are overly aggressive. Aggressive persons might be less likely to perceive a problem, but overuse of the aggressive style usually indicates a fear of being out of control and tends to keep us distant from others. This book is a fine resource for personal relationships, for work situations, or conflict management. It is readable, workable, and fun.
J**J
You get what you put in
This book provides a lot of examples with what it is trying to show you. I think it’s fantastic way to see how you respond to people and get an outside view on your own behaviors. If you put the time to do the activities you will learn a lot from the book.
W**I
Clear guidance to assertive communication
Wish I would read this book earlier.
S**K
Assertiveness
Great book. Came on time and with no damage. Thanks!
A**R
Very practical
This book has a lot of practical information that you can use with your clients if you are a therapist, or for yourself if you are buying it for personal growth. I give it a thumbs up.
S**N
Helpful
Unsure at first but I did like the workbook setting and I found it easy to read
S**R
This review is for this print edition, not the book itself
This is a fantastic resource. I have given this book to many clients over the years. This particular edition has very faint grey printing making it difficult to read. The paper also seems thin so the text is shadowed from the otherside. Its a shame to treat a great book in such a low quality manner. It feels like it should be a mass produced paperback with this low quality, but the price point - at 24.99 for a paperback doesn't match the low quality.
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