The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time

Konnikov, aside from having the PERFECT name to tackle this topic, is a talented writer. She is conversational without being too present (in that creepy, uncle-at-your-bedroom-window kind of way) and knowledgeable about the history of cons and cognitive science behind how they work and why we fall for them. She tackles the fascinating subject with the perfect blend of engaging writing, rigorous research and guilty appreciation for con men (and they are almost all men, apparently) and their devious trade.She uses plenty of historic examples of memorable and lucrative cons, as well as some painfully recent examples (Madoff, for example), strategically stretching them out across chapters to make this a borderline page-turner, as I always wanted to find out how badly the marks would be taken and if the cons ever got their comeuppance. I also appreciated the thought that went into the overall structure (the sure sign of a writer who understand the psychology of storytelling), organizing the chapters around the components of a big con — the put-up, the rope, the send, etc. — which is a great way to seed the lingo and reinforce just how complicated a con is and just how much they rely on instinctive (or learned) understanding of deep psychological concepts.Cons can only work because we humans are, mostly, wired to trust. “We are so bad at spotting deception because it’s better for us to more trusting. Trust, and not adeptness at spotting deception is the most beneficial path.” For such social, collaborative creatures, trust is vitally important to work together. And cons take advantage of that.Cons, it seems, are wired a little differently than most, often scoring high on the “dark triad” of personality traits: narcissism, Machiavellianism and psychopathy. That leaves them self-interested and joyously amoral. Luckily, evolution has seen to it that those who possess those and other maladaptive traits ever only exist in relatively small numbers, or else risk dragging the whole species down into oblivion. “Calculated nonchalance [regarding moral imperatives] is only an adaptive strategy when it’s a minority one.” Otherwise, we’d all be so busy fleecing each other and exacting revenge, the human race might just flicker out.So, along with exploitable trust, add in greed, an overwhelming desire to feel special and a few other psychological traits like “egocentric anchoring” (“We assume that other know what we know, believe what we believe, and like what we like.”) and “the mere exposure effect” (familiarity breeds affection), and the stage is set for being suckered.The part that resonated the most with me is how victims of cons often fall for a scam because of a shared predilection of all humans — our love of stories. Our brains are wired to receive information in story form, and cons are really just an elaborate, and expensive, form of story-telling that puts the victim in the center of a new and interesting universe where it makes perfect sense that they can get money for nothing or that they are of the blood line of an ancient religious order and must liquidate their resources to go on the run. It’s exciting! People want to feel special, and stories about them are the best ways to make that happen, lowering defenses and loosening purse strings in the process.And we especially love a good story that resonates with our core beliefs. “Why form accurate judgments when the inaccurate one make our life far more pleasant and easy?” Easy because we don’t have to challenge our long held assumptions (such as the fact that we really are special). The comforting story soothes away the cognitive dissonance because, “when a fact is plausible, we still need to test it. When a story is plausible, we often assume it’s true.”And cons often invoke “information priming” which exploits “the ease that comes from familiarity. Mention something in passing, and when you elaborate on it later – especially if it’s a few days later – it seems that much more convincing. It’s a phenomenon known as the illusion of truth: we are more likely to think something is true if it feels familiar.”And that goes double if that something has emotional appeal. “Our emotional reactions are often our first. They are made naturally and instinctively, before we perform any sort of evidence-based evaluation.” In other words, “Con men … are likewise expert at rapidly involving greed, pity and other emotions that can eclipse deliberation and produce an override of normal behavioral restraints.”Equal parts journalism and psychology, the end result is a riveting look at what it takes to convince people to, against all their better instincts, act against their own self-interest.

I read a lot of psychology research and theory, and her books are solid, and a nice change of pace. Great academic rigor, but still very compelling and practical writing. She just makes psychological concepts very clear and enjoyable to learn about.

One of the best books I read that helped me learn more about how to protect oneself from scammers. Well researched and comprehensive.

This book was really engaging while also covering a wealth of complex psychological knowledge. Everyone would benefit from reading this.

The Confidence Game reads like a detective novel of the human character. Maria Konnikova weaves a masterful tale of intrigue into the various ways how some have been extraordinarily successful at deceiving their fellow human beings at a large scale and how many are quite successful on a small scale pretty much anywhere you go - through their story. I like to say that I am "addicted" to facts and have very rarely been conned. Konnikova suggests that the successful con artist rarely if ever lets her/his mark get to the point where the mark finds out.She builds her case slowly and deliberately. In fact, I found it reading like walking an ever widening spiral - the reader gets back to a similar point as before (which to some might make it seem repetitive), except that Konnikova then introduces another aspect to the case in question. The most fascinating part of reading The Confidence Game for me was that the writing style and the way that the material was presented loosened up my rigid emotional mindset towards my family which mindset had prevented me from viewing my relatives for what they (mostly) really are - a bunch of con artists with very convincing stories. This is the result of one specific comment that Konnikova makes in a passage where she discusses the psychological aspects of the confidence game. There are more of these precious insights that add special value to the book and that extend its reach beyond merely a discussion of the con game itself.To explain what I mean by the personal discovery mentioned above, my fact based defense mechanism against con artists didn't prevent me from being conned by people whom I falsely believed I could trust - my own family (mother, brother etc) who constantly reassured me that they love me, care about me and stand by me in times of trouble. That they actually did very little yet professed profusely how much they cared instead had always been obvious to me, yet their abundance of words always seemed to make up for the lack of action. The Confidence Game allowed me to see, for the first time ever, and not until almost the end of the book (that's how deliberate the con artist's game is, one really needs to know the whole truth), how my family was able to pull the wool over my eyes since birth basically. Indoctrination of others for some people can apparently not start too early. In other words, I thought I had protected myself against con artists by insisting on facts, but where I refused to insist on facts was with people I mistakenly believed I could trust because of a natural bond.I read only non-fiction material, academic and non-academic. I don't recall ever having read non-fiction without footnotes. In that sense, Konnikova has pulled off a commendable job. I found it very liberating not to be bombarded with reference material. The few cases that I looked up for further information were valid and supportive. Also, I didn't feel that I had to question her perspective. In fact, I feel encouraged to apply what I have learned from The Confidence Game to any past, present and future situation in my life and to reconsider everything and anything as the need arises without necessarily blaming anyone, least of all myself.Stories can be short and long. Konnikova shows that anybody with bad intentions is capable of coming up with a story and how important it is to ignore them. That is not to say that facts cannot be deceiving, yet anyone presenting them might have a good story to tell why you should believe their facts over other facts. The Confidence Game easily gets my five stars yet deserves many more for the impact it has had on my perspective on human behavior.

This is a tricky book to review.On one hand, the information it contains is interesting and useful - a dissection of the psychology behind the con, the hows and whys of both the grifter and the mark, backed by references to scientific research.On the other, disjointed. Each chapter starts with a story that just about reaches its. Jumping to analysis. Flitting back and forth. Perhaps closing the story academically, rather than as a tale.All told, the information is there, but its presentation works against it. At times, it feels more like a stream of conscience than a well-structured analysis, even though ti contains all the material for the latter. It would probably benefit from a structural re-edit.I would give it 3.5 if possible. 3 is too low, but it doesn't deserve 4.

After reading Matthew Walker's "Why We Sleep", I'd hoped that this would be an equally insightful book into the science behind what makes cons successful and their marks victims. Sadly, there is precious little to be learned from this book, which quickly becomes tedious. The science is very thin and it is based on third party references of already published material. After reading it, I felt that I had rather wasted my time unfortunately.

Very interesting read about the confidence game. Arguments are engaging and made really well. I started reading thinking that I would never fall for some of these tricks and finished with the stark realisation that I actually have many times. You dont fall prey to a con because you are stupid, you fall prey to a con because you are human.The anecdotes and insights into the mind, suggestion and influence found in this book are valuable. Plus the brief look into religion and cults will want you to understand these particular human phenomena further!

Well written and interesting book. Working in dysfunctional workplace you can see how the lack of ethical leadership sets the tone and hence the culture that allows the corporate con artist/bulls***ter to prosper. Bad people in bad places result in bad behaviours. Another lens through which to understand people in organisations, especially if you read Andrew Spicer''s articles on corporate bulls*** - highly recommended! Once the scales are lifted from your eyes you'll never see the corporate world in the same way

If ever you want to understand how con artists sometimes get away with their dishonesty then this is a useful primer. Full of excellent psychological and behavioural economics insights.