Dear Parent: Caring for Infants With Respect (2nd Edition)

Who would ever have thought that the same generation that produced super-authoritarian parents would also produce some of the most compassionate advocates of children! Having been raised in a home that had measures of super-strictness tempered with some respect, I can say that Magda addresses all the things I wished for as a child: someone to let me know I was worth paying attention to, a lot of "permission" to do things for myself when *I* felt ready, and lots of compassion. Ms. Gerber most definitely asks the reader to consider treating those newest among us with the same care and dignity that we treat our friends--BUT she does NOT advocate letting the little ones run roughshod over us. Instead, she reminds the adults to *be* the adult and care for their own needs as well as those of the children...and wonder of wonders she advocates a way that LOWERS the stress of all involved! Cheer, cheer! This is a wonderful book to have in your "toolkit" of child-caring techniques, and I find that the chapters are short and easy to refresh me in my goals during a few minutes read. I would recommend it for almost everyone...but not for those who believe children are at heart evil little wretches filled with "original sin" that we must beat out of them. This book won't fit that philosophy.

The book is based on respect for children and allowing the natural pace of growth to happen with as less as possible interruption as possible for example the book recommends to let child sit or walk when he/she is ready and can do it on his/her own. This will first of all give them self confidence and would have stronger and healthier back and neck bones and muscles. Magda believes the less you do and the more you watch and observe infants natural abilities the better for the child you care for. Magda is the founder of "RIE" Resources for Infant Educarers and has a wonderful philosophy for child care. Children brought up with respect will become adults that respect themselves and others as well. Really recommend it to every one caring for infants.

Before you have a child, keep this in mind: more uninterrupted playtime is needed

Magda Gerber provides the most respectful and sensible guide for parenting infants. I have studied with her and consider her my mentor. She studied with Dr. Emmi Pikler in Hungary who had done extensive research in infant development which provides the basis for most care in Europe today. Magda is very practical and accepting - not condoning what parents do but encouraging respectful care. I highly recommend this book!

After reading this book when my son was a newborn, I was overwhelmed with the simplicity of it suggestions - basically treat your kid like a human being, not like a baby/thing. That has made all the difference in the world for my 12 month old (1 year) son! Of course every mom is proud, but he's walking around like a champ, takes multi-step instructions/directions (such as giving the dogs a treat, putting away the treat bag, and closes the door), and climbs up the stairs and slides down the slide by himself - all without ever pushing him to do anything. This book has helped me relax and treat him like I would want to be treated or how another human being would want to be treated, which is easier to do than to learn a new method that he'll quickly grow out of anyway. Thanks!

Excellent book. as with everything, i have to take it with a tiny grain of salt though... for example Gerber is against swaddling, I guess because she thinks babies need to move freely, etc. But swaddling works so well for us, and my baby has slept from 10pm till 6am nightly, since she was 2 months old (no crying) thanks to our swaddles, in the bassinet next to me. I say take what works for you and let the rest go, but the basic ideas in this book I think are fantastic and really have helped me so much. I have mothered my first child with her philosophy as my guide. Thanks!

This was a great read, with sound advice. The RIE approach of being fully present some of the time instead of half-present all of the time is a lesson I can make use of with everyone and everything in my life, not only my infant. There were a few times though when I wanted to say "Oh, Magda, your trauma is showing." Particularly when she talked about feeding and holding. But then again she herself says right at the beginning of the book, take what you need and leave the rest. The example of an average RIE day at the end of the book helps illustrate how exceptional this way of thinking of and behaving with infants is. Even if at times Gerber's specific words seem harsh, the reality of the practice seems quite loving and flexible.

One may think this is a 'radical' approach to child rearing when in fact it is truly common sensical and down-to-earth. Many books written today about methods of parenting are fairly new (for example Baby Wise) and the long term implications to the kids who are subjected to these 'experiments' and fads are not known. This author has dedicated her life to this research and has worked with others who have been caring for infants this way since our parents were babies (for some of us, even since our grandparents were babies). One reviewer says this method should be called "hands off" parenting. That is not an accurate way to portray it. Since reading this I have actually been better at tuning in to and understanding my son's needs. I've read this and Magda Gerber's "Your Self Confident Baby". Both are great but I prefer the way this one is written. I have read books about and am familiar with several other styles of parenting and I cannot see how any of them are better for the baby than this one. Parents will really be doing themselves and their kids a huge service to read and comprehend this method. It truly is an investment in their future. Observing the infant does take practice but it really is rewarding, so be sure and give it some time.

must read for every parent who wanted to bring up their children as 'authentic individuals'. Was late to buy this book (my son is 10 months) but better late than never..

The best book for new parents ever.

This book may look dated on the outside but it is entirely relevant to today's world and raising children to become well adjusted and happy adults. I continually go back to this book when I have questions or I feel unsure of how to approach young children. The insight that she has is AMAZING.

What a find! Not since reading John Bowlby's book 'A Secure Base' have I been so happy to find a book on child development - this is a great book (Dear Parent.) It is wise, simple, kind but also profoundly knowledgeable. For all parents and mums to be - please read it - and enjoy parenthood!

Such a great book. Only wish I had read it while pregnant